PROGRESS OBERIKO BLOG

  I did something today that I’m really proud of, even though I ended up breaking down in tears after — Calling out racism! I’ve met lovely people across all races since I moved to the UK. I’ve had very pleasant and memorable experiences. But I’ve also encountered people who left me with unpalatable experiences. One very repetitive disgusting experience is RACISM!  I don’t care how covert it is, it is evident and it absolutely disgusting! So today I discovered a massive mall not very far from me and I went on a tour. It is called Exchange mall located in Illford East London!  One of the shops I visited was TK Maxx , I looked around a bit as I window shopped, and on my way out as I approached the exit door, I saw a security staff dutifully positioned there.  I clearly heard one of his colleagues giving him an instruction through his walkie-talkie phone. He said, “The Black Female approaching, keep an eye on her”.  Now, I was the only Black female approaching the ...

  One of the proudest things I’ve done in my life is resigning from a toxic work environment. I once worked with this Start-up organization, where the CEO was a real bossy boss.  He was walking in his “CEO shoes” every day of his life, he was so obsessed with achieving his dream for his org that he cared less about his employees!  We would use our personal emails and our personal mobile number to reach out to clients.  I remember suggesting that a work phone should be provided for me because the clients were beginning to encroach on my personal space, but I was told off and tagged a complainer. In so many ways we were going out of our way to help him achieve his goals for his organization, yet these sacrifices meant nothing to him.  He kept demanding more.  He’d give us tasks that encroached into our weekends even though working weekends wasn’t part of our employment contract, and when we fell short of delivery he’d scold us so harshly, making us feel like ...

  “If someone ghosts you, respect the dead and move on .”  I saw this quote somewhere, and in as much as I strongly agree with the post, I also believe that there are arguably situations where it might be the wrong advice.  I once had a friend who for some reason decided to stop speaking to me. And whenever I try to reach out to him I was snubbed and got no response. I took this personally, given that we had no prior brawl, and there was no reason for such behavior. I had every reason to believe that I was being ghosted, and I believed so.  But following my gut feeling, I thought I should double-check. So I continued reaching out to him via chats, and eventually, he responded! He said he had been going through a phase of depression following the loss of his mom, hence his silence . I became so empathetic with him, understanding that I wasn’t actually being ghosted.  I have since come to learn that our assumptions might not always be right. You can be so sure yet...

  I currently share a flat with this girl, an amazing personality, but there’s a tiny bugbear! We both do our individual cleanups, but there are times when if I find her unclean dishes in the sink I wash them alongside mine. It is just the both of us living in the apartment, and for me, it’s no big deal to wash someone’s dish if I find them in the sink while washing mine.  But for this girl, apparently, it is the opposite. No matter how many times I’ve washed her dish, she has never for once washed mine if she finds it in the sink. Even if it is just a spoon. She’ll move it to one side and wash hers only.  P.S I don’t deliberately leave my unwashed dish in the sink, except when I’m in haste. This has been a concern. I know say nobody send me to wash for her, but I can’t just see her dish while washing, and ignore it. I’ve tried to, but I couldn’t! My conscience wouldn’t let me!  Part of me feels like I should stop, even though I don’t see a big deal in carrying on, b...

  📍 During chatting, it is really improper for you to address someone you’re unfamiliar with as “ My love”, “My darling” “Baby”, etc.  - You don’t know them, they’re not your friend or acquaintance, so you should NOT begin a chat with “hello my love”. Or “hello beautiful Angel”.  - At least from what I know, a mature and sensible person will not start his sentence with “hello my love”. How is the person your lover? Do you know them before?  - Starting a message with “hi honey” or “hi beautiful angel” is very off-putting, at least for me.  Most times I don’t even respond to such messages in the first place.  📍 When you chat someone, don’t just say “hi” and wait for them to reply.  People get many of such “hi” in their Dms, so try to make yours stand out.  If you don’t have anything to say you can simply leave a compliment, instead of just hi.  You can also find a topic to chat about. It could be about their post or something they shared. Sh...

On my way to work today, a pregnant lady collapsed and passed out right in front of me. It was on the Overground train.  She had gotten to her stop at Blackhorse road and was just about to alight. And suddenly she slowly collapsed on her back, landing on the floor inside the train.  I was already in panic mode, and the Nigerian in me was quickly gonna grab her as I saw her fall, to prevent her from falling to the floor and possibly hitting her head, but I was surprised to see the other passengers standing and watching her collapse, without doing anything. (This is quite a British attitude anyway. They’ll watch you fall and then ask you “are you okay”? Lol) Part of me felt I might be doing the wrong thing by grabbing her since many others weren’t attempting to do the same, so I held on a bit. I’m pretty new in town, so not entirely sure about what the acceptable reaction is in certain situations. After she had landed on the floor unconscious, a young Black lady then rushed to h...